Keys to Powerful Living: Overcoming Child Abuse

Breaking Through The Veil Of Shame

Silent, uncontrollable sobbing ... Bruises and beatings ... Shoving and slapping ... Children so traumatized they're afraid of their own shadows. And the endless string of lies ... "He fell down." "It was an accident." But child abuse is no accident. It violates God's fundamental purpose for man. And parents and children around the world find themselves ensnared in its cruel clutches.

From Taboo to Truth

When people hear the term "child abuse" they may think it only occurs in under-educated, poverty-stricken families. However, this epidemic occurs in all types of families.

In Nigeria alone, reported cases of child abuse exceed 1 million each year, and some experts say the actual number of abuse victims may be far greater.

Types of child abuse include physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse and neglect. Affected children often suffer physical injuries, emotional scars, malnutrition, and sadly, even death. Child abuse also spiritually cripples precious young lives. These children may struggle to accept God as their loving heavenly Father (Matt. 18:5-6). Other family members often suffer silently. Even the offender suffers, increasingly bound by the shame and secrecy of the addictive behavior.

But as many have already discovered, there is hope. The vicious cycle of abuse can be broken, especially as we present our wounds to the Gentle Healer, Jesus Christ.

What Drives the Sin of Abuse?

So what causes child abuse? Often, parents who abuse their children have been victims of abuse themselves. Driven by years of repressed hatred, these parents continue the cycle.

Sometimes even the most dedicated parents can momentarily lose control -- frustrated by a child's actions or simply overwhelmed by their own sense of failure or frustration. But an isolated incident or two, left unchecked, can become a destructive force, tearing apart a family.

God's View of Abuse

The Bible gives much practical advise on the subject of child-rearing. "Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it," says the writer of Proverbs ( 22:6). Parents are clearly cautioned to take steps to correct foolishness which "is bound up in the heart of a child" ( Prov. 22:15).

Parental discipline is essential, but some parents view these Scriptures as giving absolute control over their children. This is not true. God's Word should never be used as a license for abuse. Parents need to discipline their children, but they must keep their own emotions and actions in check ( Eph. 6:4, Col. 3:21). In God's eyes there simply is no justification for abuse.

Finding Help

If you are trapped in the unrelenting cycle and sin of child abuse, don't leave this webpage until you have made a commitment before the Lord to break this destructive pattern. It won't be easy, but it could be a matter of life and death. Understand that you are not alone. Jesus knows you better that you could ever know yourself (see Psalm 139), and He is willing and able to help ( Heb. 4:15-16). But you need to ask for His grace to share honestly your struggle with a trusted brother or sister in Christ, or with your pastor. Follow these steps to get help.

1. Acknowledge the problem. To receive healing, admit that you have a problem. Once you've broken the silence and confessed your sin of abuse, God's grace and forgiveness can begin to restore you ( Psalm 32:3-7). 2. Acknowledge your weakness. Allow God to minister in your weakness, for in it He can make you strong ( 2 Cor. 12:9, Heb. 1:32-34). 3. Take action. Pray with other believers and share your struggles, seeking the help of pastors, or other appropriate counselors ( Prov. 15:22,James 5:16).

If You've Been Abused

If you have been the victim of abuse, you need to know that God has not abandoned you. He is "intimately acquainted" with all your ways ( Psalm 139:3). He knows your pain, and He has a plan for complete healing and restoration for your life. Consider these simple steps as you seek the Father's healing.

1. Face the abuse. The shame associated with abuse is unbearable. You can hide the pain for a season, but eventually, the wounds will surface. But take comfort, for God knows the horror that you have unjustly endured (see Psalm 139, Matt. 10:29-31). Ask God for the strength to face your nightmare of abuse.

2. Forgive and release. As difficult as it may sound, you need to begin by forgiving the perpetrator for his or her actions against you. It may seem impossible, but the consequences of unforgiveness can produce even further destruction (2 Samuel 13:23-29). Instead, ask God to give you the grace you need to forgive (1 Samuel 1:15-17, Psalm 42:3-4, Psalm 62:8).

3. Seek shelter. If you are still in an abusive situation, immediately seek shelter. Consider turning to family members, your church family, or perhaps authorities if necessary. Ultimately, rest in God's shelter. Turn to His Word (the Psalms offer much encouragement for the downcast).

4. Move on. Once you have taken steps to forgive, ask God to help you pick up the pieces, and seek again the abundant life in Jesus that He has for you ( John 10:10). Press on and leave the past to God ( Phil. 3:13-14).

As You Pray

If your life has been devastated by child abuse, turn to Jesus right now, and, on bended knee, ask Him to take control of your life: "Dear Lord. I have never been confronted with a deeper, more urgent need than right now. Please minister to me and my family members in Your perfect love and compassion. Break the chains which bind us. And restore us to the joy of Your salvation as we receive forgiveness and healing in Christ Jesus. Amen."

God's Word on Child Abuse

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise), that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth. And, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." ( Eph. 6:1-4)

                               

OPRAH WINFREY STORY

Oprah: I was raped when I was only 9

By Jenny Johnson

Behind Oprah Winfrey’s €2bn net worth are stories of pain, struggle, and  eventually triumph.

The media mogul recounted her own experiences with abuse, which included being raped at the age of nine, during an appearance at Ball State University, Indiana, part of a lecture series fellow chat show host David Letterman sponsors at his alma mater.

“Anybody who has been verbally abused or physically abused will spend a great deal of their life rebuilding their esteem,” Winfrey said in front of 3,000 students.

She recounted being physically beaten as a child, saying it was a cultural experience many African- American children went through. She also said was raped and molested.

“You’re an extraordinary person who lived through hell,” said Letterman.

“You were not consumed, you prevailed.”

Winfrey talked about some of the positive aspects of her life: How she learned to read before she was three, how she wished to be Diana Ross, and how she skipped school because she wrote a note to her teacher.

Description of her happy times didn’t last, though.

“I grew up in an environment where children were seen and not heard,” she said.

Letterman asked her to clarify: “You were struck.”

“Oh, I was beaten regularly.”

One such beating, she said, stuck out in vividly in her mind.

“I went to a well to get some water and carry it in a bucket. And I was playing in the water with my fingers, and my grandmother had seen me out the window and she didn’t like it.

“She whipped me so badly that I had welts on my back and the welts would bleed. And then when I put on my Sunday dress, I was bleeding from the welts. And then she was very upset with me because I got blood on the dress.

“So then I got another whipping for getting blood on the dress,” she said.

The Ball State Daily News reports that Letterman took Winfrey through each city she lived in throughout her childhood. At every turn, one story of pain after another thickened the air with emotion.

At 6, Winfrey left her grandmother to live with her mother. While there, the woman in charge of keeping the house forced Winfrey to sleep on the porch. At 9, she was raped.

“He took me to an ice cream shop — blood still running down my leg — and bought me ice cream.”

Winfrey was sexually abused from the ages of 10 to 14, when she found out she was pregnant. It was around this time that her mother took her to a detention home. Too many girls were housed in the home, so Winfrey couldn’t stay. “My mother said, ‘you are getting your ass out of this house’,” she said.

So she went to live with her father, who forbade her from dating, having sex or any deviant activity. He didn’t know she was pregnant when she moved in.

Two weeks after she had the child, it died. It was painful, she said, but both Winfrey and her father saw this as a second chance.

It wasn’t until she was in an acting workshop this summer that her emotions about the situation surfaced again.

“I buried all of my feelings about it.

“I really felt like that baby’s life — that baby coming into the world — really gave me new life. That’s how I processed it for myself.”

Even after she escaped her troubled childhood, Winfrey still faced struggles. When she went to Chicago, her supervisors said they had no chance to compete against talk show host Phil Donahue, whom she would eventually take over in ratings.

Through all of the pain and struggle, Winfrey triumphed. She was thankful, she said, for everything that had happened. “I would take nothing from my journey.

“Everybody’s looking for the same thing,” she said, that sense of ‘was I okay?’ That means, do you hear me and is what I’m saying important to you.’ Everyone is looking for that validation.

“I know what it feels like to not be wanted ... you can use it as a stepping stone to build great empathy for people.”

Winfrey remained humble when Letterman told her he was impressed with her life. “You understand that this is stunning,” he said. “Your human existence is stunning.”

“I never thought of my life as stunning,” she replied. “It’s just my life.”

Letterman didn’t accept her answer, though.

“Most people would use this life as an excuse,” he said. “You were not consumed; you prevailed.”

“I really did believe there was a power greater than myself...” she said, adding that there was nothing in her life that she would ever take back. “Everybody has a story and your story is as equally as valuable and important as my story.

“My story just helped define and shape me as does everybody’s story.”

The queen of talk also shared her biggest regret with The Oprah Winfrey Show. “The one thing I most regret is I wasn’t able to move the needle far enough on abuse in this country,” she said.

She explained that too many people still don’t understand sexual abuse is not just about the act of abuse, but about the misuse of trust and shame that follow.

Never be ashamed of a scar, it simply means you were stronger than you ever tried to hurt you.

Stay strong. 

please report any case of child abuse, cruelty and neglect.

hhcichildren@gmail.com

08138304862

Recent Happen On Child Abuse

47-year-old man rapes neighbour’s 18 month old baby in Ikorodu

BY TIWA TIWA · AUGUST 9, 2016

A 47-year-old man, Emmanuel Magbatie, has been arrested for allegedly defiling an 18-month-old girl (names withheld) in Owutu axis of Ikorodu, Lagos State.

This came barely a week after the Lagos State Government sought compulsory psychiatric test for rape and other domestic violence offenders in the country.

Vanguard gathered that Magbatie, an artisan, who reside in same building as the victim’s parents, defiled the girl last week Wednesday. It was learned that the victim was rushed to Ikorodu General Hospital by her parents for treatment and to ascertain the impact of the act on her. Vanguard investigation revealed that a day after, the victim was taken to Mirabel Centre at Lagos State University Teaching Hospital, LASUTH, Ikeja, for test to help the child overcome issues that may arise after.

Coordinator of Lagos State Domestic and Sexual Violence Response Team, DSVRT, Mrs. Lola Vivour-Adeniyi, who confirmed the act, lamented that the mother of the victim affirmed that the perpetrator was her neighbour. She noted that the victim’s mother visited Mirabel Centre at LASUTH for appropriate medical assistance and to aid the judicial processes. Vivour-Adeniyi noted that DSVRT facilitated the transfer of the case from the Owutu Police Station to the gender desk of the state Police Command in Ikeja last Friday to expedite action on the case.

She noted that the Perpetrator would be detained to allow the completion of the test and issuance of result from Mirabel Centre, after which the case would be charged to court for proper judgment. Effort to speak to the Police Public Relations Officer, SP Dolapo Badmus proved abortive, as she neither responded to calls nor replied text messages sent to her.

Gossip Time!!!!...........

By jumoke Yusuf
So, a fourteen years old girl got impregnated, by her twenty- five years old neighbor right under her parents' nose. These parents out of fury, got the mentally derailed paedophile arrested for abusing their daughter sexually.

After the culprit had been in detention for three days, his parents started pleading on behalf of their son and agreed to take full responsibility of the child and her pregnancy. However, the father of the child refused and insisted that their son was going to rot in jail for his actions.

I later got to know that the police force, summoned the parents of the culprit and the victim for a peaceful settlement. The policemen pleaded on behalf of the culprit with the dumbest excuse that their daughter was not raped, the culprit will accept full responsibility of the pregnancy and that,  it is unafrican to get their "INLAW" sent to prison. Like seriously??.... INLAW??

Trust me, i am still finding it hard to believe that the police force who were meant to protect the child's right law as stated in the constitution could reason this way. What a diplomatic way of maintaining law and order in the society!

And to think that, the parents of this girl accepted this disheartening settlement, just made me hate them more.

They failed woefully in parenting their child and denied their child and other teenage girls out there, the right to justice. That paedophile guy, has just been given another chance to victimize other teenage girls out there. #smh

Hiann.... some parents and policemen can fall hands sha... I even heard the culprit is an okada rider and he ran away already....

Gossip over...

A sales girl raped to death in Delta state

A sales girl, simply identified as “Yellow,” has been bludgeoned to death after she was raped in Delta State.

It was gathered that her assailants attacked her inside the building material store where she worked at Afiesere community, Ughelli, Delta State.

Her lifeless body was discovered at about 5p.m. on Tuesday, by her employer who came to the shop,
following reports that the shop had not been opened for business all day, only to discover her lifeless body.

Giving detail of the incident, a resident of the community who gave his name as Efemena Omokaro, claimed the lifeless body of the victim was discovered naked and mutilated inside the inner room of the shop. He told Vanguard:

“From what we saw on the corpse, she was attacked and killed in the morning by someone close to her. But the manner in which she was attacked calls for concern as such a thing has never happened in this community.”

Confirming the incident, a senior police officer, who spoke in confidence, said police had commenced investigation, having been briefed by the employer of the victim and the land owner of the building where the shop is located.

Culled from tiwasblog.com